Our shadow, like our light, are the things we embrace, love and enjoy. It contains all the things we don’t like about ourselves. It is everything we don’t want people to find out about us, and everything we don’t want to see. Sometimes, our shadow is not so pretty to look at. We try to keep it buried deep inside our psyche.
If left ignored, our shadow can find a way to come to the surface. It can destroy relationships as it shows itself like a faux reflection of others. Yet, our shadow is all about us. It can crush our dreams and spirits or sabotage our life when not listened to or examined.
This same shadow also has the ability to be our greatest teacher. If we can learn to fully embrace it, it can teach us kindness, forgiveness, strength, joy and ultimately our innate beauty. It shows us the beauty and power that each of us hold.
Our shadow only has power over us if we keep it in the dark, ignore it, and use it to blame others for our shortcomings. Continued suppression of our dark shadow will leak out into our lives with a slow seeping poison. Instead examine what we don’t like about ourselves and stop suppressing it. Once we acknowledge these aspects of the self, we become free. Free of fear and pain. We can now live our life with greatness and compassion, love openly in our relationships, and learn how to reach our full potential.
My Shadow Work
While working on my shadow, my mentor gave me a very large rock to carry all day. While holding this rock, all I could concentrate on was the vast weight of it. It felt almost impossible to get out of that situation. I felt stuck and scared, tired and annoyed by it. Once I started to reflect on the weight, I could see how that represented all my fears, worries, doubts, and burdens. Not only just mine, but those of the world.
Then, I started to look at the rock for what it was. It was smooth, had multiple layers of intricate colors and lines to admire. As I looked closer the rock had more beauty, colors and intricacy than I had originally noticed. It was strong and unbreakable. I then began to appreciate the rock for its value, fall in love with it and everything it represented. I was no longer concentrating on the weight and the burden of this large rock, but the beauty of it. The weight of the rock represented the beauty of my pain.
My mentor then gave me a pebble to hold in the other hand, and funny enough, it felt like the same weight. I no longer felt the heaviness as they both were just representations of what I was holding onto and the story I made up about both of these rocks. I ran with both, played with both and found balance between these two sizably different rocks with comfort and ease.
In this work, I discovered how grateful I was for the burden, or my shadow. It allowed me to transmute my beliefs of pain and burdens by breaking through the limitations I had unknowingly set within myself. And, with time, I was able to break through to the next level of consciousness. The weight of my beliefs had been shed allowing me to move forward. Once you can find balance and make peace with the light and the darkness that we all hold, your perceptions shift and your understanding heightens in a cosmic way lifting us out of the constraints that our own limitations had set.
To find out more about breaking through your limitations, beliefs, and situations that can seem painful and heavy, reach out to me. I can show you how shadow work can help you become the best version of yourself. Schedule a confidential discussion to see how this process works. Contact me via email at Amy@AmyD.me or schedule a call directly on my calendar .
It can sometimes seem the world is pushing down and holding our emotions hostage. The constant stream of negative news fires up our outrage and keeps it burning. Anger is often portrayed as wild emotions, uncontrollable—something to avoid. It prohibits us from actively listening to others, thinking logically, and presenting our best self. In the heat of the moment, our reputations can be undermined by anger.
Buddha said, “You’re not punished for your anger; you’re punished by your anger.” Anger is a human emotion. In and of itself, it is not harmful. Like any fire, if you try to contain it, it can consume all of its surroundings. So, the key to managing your anger isn’t locking it inside and denying its existence.
Set it free.
Set the fire free usually means it grows. Firefighters use controlled fires to benefit the forest and the environment around them. Controlling the anger will help you keep a level head as a leader and in life when events ignite your anger. Anger becomes harmful when we hold it in. Grudges ground your spirit. They keep you from moving forward.
Once we learn how to master our anger, we can take the energy produced by our emotions and release them. Holding grudges consumes our energy. That’s energy we can use to fuel our productivity. Our creativity rejuvenates us. When we control the emotions within us, especially anger, we present our best selves. Not only that, but we reserve enough of our energy to fuel our spirit and our projects. We work productively.
Here are some ways we can control our anger and release the energy. The Mayo Clinic suggests these 10 tips to release your anger.
Think before you speak. Staying grounded by journaling, meditation, and listening to music can help you stay calm so that thinking before you speak in anger is obtainable.
Express your anger. This is the key releasing it.
Get some exercise. Exercise generates endorphins that help you feel calmer and better.
Identify possible solutions. By shifting your focus to solutions, it takes the kindling away from fire. Write down solutions if convenient, or say them aloud to diffuse your anger.
Take a time out. There’s nothing wrong with walking away from the situation. Cooler heads prevail.
Stick with “I” statements to avoid criticizing others. Be specific and respectful when giving feedback. This will avoid blaming others and refocus on the problem.
Don’t hold a grudge. Grudges are emotional anchors and consume your precious energy.
Use humor. Humor defuses tension and is the opposite of anger.
Practice relaxation skills. Practice deep breathing exercises. Write your feelings in a journal. You can even throw it away after you release it in your writing.
Seek help. If at any time, your anger burns out of control, seek professional help with managing it.
Are you reading to commence your next journey? Reach out to me, AmyD, the Peak Performance Expert and Trainer.
The desire for instant gratification is a part of the human condition. Quick fixes, such as pain relievers that have been in the news recently, mask the original problem without addressing it. The desire to have these problems go away immediately and the reliance on external gratifications systems are leading our country into an epidemic of addictions. When experiencing an injury, typically an individual will go to the doctor.
Seeking help to resolve the pain caused by an injury maybe be the root cause of some cases of addiction. According to the Centers for Disease Control, an estimated 1 in 5 patients with a non-cancer related diagnosis are prescribed opioids in a doctor’s office. Opioids are a class of drugs that interact with nerve cells in the brain and nervous system to produce pleasurable effects and relieve pain. Opioids include several types of drugs: oxycodone, hydrocodone, codeine, morphine, fentanyl and heroin. These drugs relieve physical pain and send a message to your brain that you are no longer injured. That is all an illusion created by the blocked pain receptors. Opioid pain relievers only mask the pain, they do not heal or aid in the repair of the original cause of the pain.
Not everyone who is prescribed a pain-killer or an opioid becomes addicted. However, addictions in general follow this pattern of masking pain, whether that pain is sourced from the physical body or the emotional body. CBS News recently reported that state Attorney Generals are questioning drug companies about how opioids are made and marketed. They are getting fed up with the 12 deaths per day caused by this drug. It’s unlikely that you will meet someone who hasn’t been touched by the effects of opioid addiction. My graduating class alone lost 22 individuals over the years due to this debilitating disease. It’s sad.
All of this begs the question: why are we so accepting of this mask? We know that concealing our pain causes a negative effect on our lives. Masking that pain aggravates our original physical and emotional injuries thus perpetuating the cycle of pain. That cycle spreads to our loved ones and begins to affect other aspects of our life, creating divides in our personal relationships and hindering personal and spiritual growth.
Speak to your doctor or counselor to take the first steps in recognizing the source of your pain and the best steps for healing. In a previous blog post, I discussed how meditation positively impacts your brain. Mindfulness will put you in the appropriate state of mind to face your problems head-on. And if traditional and main-stream methods don’t seem to work for your, consider energetic healing.
Energetic healing or energy work cleanses the body and energies to expedite the healing process for both physical and emotional pain. It works deep to the root of your pain source. While the root of physical maladies is usually recognizable, very often, the root of emotional maladies is not quite so easy to identify. My work with individuals often focuses on peak performance. In the process of reaching that peak, we strip away all of the energetic clutter that is an encumbrance. This same process can help you heal. I want to help you remove the mask and live life full of joy and love. You can learn more about my bioenergetic work on my website and sign up for a session.
When we first start out at a new job or opportunity, we are like a roaring fire. Our fire burned bright, drawing eyes and attention of others. You’ve seen that fire before. Over time the fire burns down, simmers and smolders. It’s still there, generating heat. Yet, it isn’t nearly as bright or eye-catching. It may have been tempered by time and regret.
Regret is often portrayed as a negative emotion. It can; however, be a powerful motivator. Use it to reignite the dull flame and passion within you.
According to the Harvard Business Review, the top five career regrets are as follows:
1.) I wish I hadn’t taken the job for the money.
2.) I wish I had quit earlier.
3.) I wish I had the confidence to start my own business.
4.) I wish I had used my time at school more productively.
5.) I wish I had acted on my career hunches.
These regrets can easily parlay into other areas of our lives, beyond our career. Money is often an enticing motivator, but it quickly wanes. It’s shallow. The Bible states the root of all evil is money. It brings little joy and leaves regret and disappointment in its wake. It drowns our fire, and dampens our spirits.
When we place our faith in physical things, our souls are starved for more fulfilling engagement. We discover those in meaning and challenging work. So, when we regret accepting a job for money, or being motivated by money, we can use it as kindling to ignite a fire to do more. It’s the challenge that sparks our creativity, our sense of purpose, and desire to achieve.
The second career regret on the list is, “I wish I had quit earlier.” Oftentimes the warning signs along a dangerous highway are visible. We simply ignore them. Either because we’re caught in the frenzy of the ride or we’re distracted. Either way, we must focus to observe and take in what’s happening around us. Meditation can help us be present in the moment. Keeping a journal will allow us to be reflective. All of these activities will help us become more observant. We gain clarity to see when it’s time to stop.
Risk is scary. Starting a business is not only risky, but requires confidence in your abilities. It’s akin to jumping without a parachute. Life is about risk. It’s about being ignited and on fire! Be passionate about your interests. Step out on faith and gain confidence in your abilities to transform your hobby into a profession.
Education is one of the most important aspects of one’s life. Wishing more time was spent at school being productive is the fourth regret. Despite looking back on what could have been, you can seek out new opportunities in education. You can also utilize current opportunities to seek out productive ways to grow. Ask your current employer. It’s never too late to go back to school.
The final regret stated people regretted not acting on their career hunches. Like most of the previous regrets, this one stems from looking backward, versus going forward. This is also one where gaining clarity and meditating will help. Channel those feelings of regret into a fire. Use it to motivate you to push toward the goals you want to accomplish.
Regardless of what past regret is dulling your fire, you can still ignite a fire of new opportunities.
Are you reading to ignite the spark? Reach out to me, AmyD, the Peak Performance Expert and Trainer.
What usually comes to mind when we think about addiction is the compulsive consumption of unhealthy substances like fatty food, cigarettes, alcohol and drugs. While many of us take pride in avoiding these harmful habits, we rarely think about our mental addictions that can have the same debilitating impact on our mood, our personal and professional relationships, and our physical health.
Almost everyone I know has felt that obsessive urge, a persistent compulsion, to check our phones or laptops for the latest email or social media update. Some of us also struggle with peeling our eyes from our television or stepping away from our video games. In short, we as a society are fixated, addicted to anything with a screen.
What’s also shocking is that nearly everyone I’ve spoken to wishes they were less attached to their devices and more engaged with the world around them. The problem is that our digital devices actually serve an important purpose in our lives- connecting with others.
Fortunately, I am offering three ways you can gently unplug while still using technology for what’s it worth.
In my videos, I talk about the importance of setting boundaries so that you keep your mind focused on fulfilling your life’s highest calling. Thanks to technological advances, we are able to reach out to virtually everyone and anyone at any time, which makes respecting others’ boundaries very difficult. For the sake of your own peace and clarity, you must decrease others’ expectations that- through texting or social media messaging- you will always be available to them. Set a time during the day when you’reavailable to others, both personally and professionally, and times when you are not. If you get a text in the evening from a co-worker, explain that you’ll take care of it first thing in the morning. These boundaries are necessary if you’re to maintain a positive, balanced energy.
Stressed? Put Down the Gadgets
By not setting boundaries between yourself and the digital mediums through which everyone can contact you, you put yourself at risk of burning out. Workaholics and other people who push themselves to the brink of collapse, in both their professional and personal lives, can be successful… up to a point. They have yet to achieve the kind of long-term, sustainable, world-altering elite success that they were clearly meant for. To truly capitalize on all of your strengths, to be fully invested in long-term gain, you must know when to replenish your energy.
When you’re stressed out, anxious, frustrated or bored, put down the technology. Turn off the screens. Put your smart phone on sleep mode. Set aside time for deliberate rest, which will increase your physical and mental capacities when you’re ready to start up again. Mental clarity and focus is necessary to achieve the vision you have for your future, and you can only do that by taking a break from digital distractions.
Stop Using Technology To Multi-Task
Research has proven that no one is good at multi-tasking, no matter what people may say. Human beings are most productive when they’re mindfully focused on the challenge at hand, not having their attention pulled in different directions. Unfortunately, our computers, televisions, and especially our smart phones make it difficult for us to focus intently on one task without being driven to distraction. Those shiny screens are meant to draw our attention away from the possibilities of the here-and-now. Don’t let it happen.
To quote Nike, just do it. When you’ve set yourself up for accomplishing a goal, big or small, you must make a mental commitment to finish what you started. You can’t do that if you’re distracted by texts, social media updates, or clickbait. Take a moment to pause and reflect on the work you ought to be doing this very moment, whether it’s accomplishing a certain goal or simply being present in the world.
The mind is everything. What you think you become. –Buddha
Have you ever felt stuck? Or like you’re moving in the wrong direction? Maybe you feel that way now. Like, for every two steps you take forward, you take three more backwards. You are definitely not alone in this. We have all at one point or another felt lost, or stuck, or like we’re moving in the wrong direction. But, why does this happen? And what can we do to change these feelings?
If you look closely, you’ll notice that so many of the things that make you feel stuck are related. Life, work, finances, relationships are all connected in a very big way. When one of these elements is out of alignment, the rest seem to very quickly follow suit. Why is this? Because there is a chain reaction within our cellular structure that sends out a frequency shifting the order and direction of things.
So, how do we shift the balance back in our favor? It all boils down to the way we think. The way you think can affect you on a cellular level. Am I saying that negative thinking is dangerous for your health? YES! This is not to alarm you, it is to make you aware that we need to be MORE CONSCIOUS of the words we say and what we think, as these often contribute to our feeling of ‘stuckness’. But, don’t despair! You can train yourself out of these negative thought patterns!
Some of you may think this sounds exhausting or like an insurmountable challenge, but there are many out there who have overhauled their lives and got started simply by adding a little positivity to their thought process. Norman Vincent Peale may have summed it up best:
Formulate and stamp indelibly on your mind a mental picture of yourself as succeeding. Hold this picture tenaciously. Never permit it to fade. Your mind will seek to develop the picture… Do not build up obstacles in your imagination.
The solution to “design the desired life” is bio-energetic maintenance on top of surrounding yourself with good. What do I mean by good? I mean maintaining a healthy relationship to money, food, the environment, your thoughts, the people in your life, even the way you entertain yourself.
Still feel confused? Reach out. I can help you retrain your negative thought patterns so you can live the life that you deserve. Here’s what Meredith S. had to say about our work together:
“When I met Amy I was confused, angry and lost. I was working on an offer within my business and I just couldn’t get it to stick. Within 3 days of our work together, the products revenue was 23k, then after less than a month upward of 120k …and still creating revenue. So within a month, my business went from little to no sales to a six figure machine. Amy has been a transformative force in my business and personal life!”